Saturday, July 29, 2006


Editors Note: This is an odd one. Ok, a cake as a gift on the first date is indeed an eccentric gift, but should she have slammed the door in his face? Then again, insisting he come inside and watch "her" eat some (not eat it together) made me think she made the right move...any comments on this one?

This was my first date with an ex-coworker of mine who'd been quite insistant on dating me for 2 years. I agreed once I had landed a different job, making my agreeance more of a pity date. But I had the bad luck to agree to a Valentine's Day Date.
He was "dropped off" by a friend in a rasping-against-the-ground junker, complete with 1 hubcap. He emerged from the car with a pink box. I didn't understand at the time, thinking perhaps it was some sort of gift box with flowers inside? I smiled, stood at my front door as his friend leaned out of the car smiling, car idling, which brought me to the unmistakable fear that he would be our "ride."
When he reached the steps, I noticed he was dressed from head to toe in blue. Blue jeans, blue polo and yes blue suede shoes. I cracked a nervous smile as he thrust the pink box into my arms. I wanted to open it later, but he said, "No open it now." I agreed, opened the box.
A heart-shaped red glazed vanilla cake that had pink candy hearts on top awaited inside.
I didn't know what to say. Who the hell brings a Cake to their date? Taking my stunned silence as speechless-in-delight, he leaned in and attempted to kiss me. I adverted my gaze and dropped my head, and his lips gnashed my cheek.
"My friend made it for me. He hooked it up- he works at a bakery," he said, again smiling. I nodded, feigned a smile over at his friend, who honked the horn impatiently. Then came the worst part.
"Why don't we go inside so you can eat some-" my date offered. I stared at him like he was an idiot and he said, "C'mon I'm not going to try anything. I didn't bring a fork."
I walked back in, with him in tow & abruptly slammed the door in his face and dropped the cake off on the counter of my kitchen. It was by far the most horrifying "date" I had ever had.
I relayed the store to my ex-coworkers afterwards, who then branded him "Cake Boy."

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Another Barf Story

Editors Note: After reading literally hundreds of bad date stories I've noticed that in quite a few of them, the date turns bad after someone starts do try to avoid it...and now the latest entry:
Definitely a bus tour, if you don't know what a bus tour is it is where a number of people book out a bus for the night, pay a flat rate then it entitles you to free beer,wine and soft drink. also surprise destinations to a number of night clubs. Being younger and stupid hadn't eaten had a few drinks (too Many) and with every destination we arrived was chucking up in the gutter, out the bus window and in the toilets of the night clubs. By the end of the night my dress had split, my underwear and my underwear was on show whilst my partner was trying to hold me up walking down a very popular mall. Have never done it again. not recommended.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

The On-line Dating Life

Thanks to our anonymous friend for telling us about these dating gems, if you have a true bad date story of your own, please share it with us by leaving it in the comment section below or mailing it to us at , thanks.
I am certainly not dissing online dating. In fact I have had some nice dates as a result. No one has really got my juices flowing yet but some dates have been real doozies. The great thing about online dating is pre-date you get the chance to read a bit about a person, learn likes and dislikes and usually before the date you talk on the phone to determine if you really would like to meet in person. Here are a few of the best of the worst real dates.

Contestant #1 – Invites me over for dinner and the Sopranos. This is our 3rd date so it wasn’t completely strange to be invited over to watch TV. I bring over two nice bottles of wine, since I am a polite guest. Well “dinner” ends up being a night of me watching him feed his pet python live rats. I should have taken my wine and ran away.

Contestant #2 – Proceeds to invite me out to lunch, then gets tied up at work and cancels. This happens three more times. He then calls on a Saturday night around 9PM and says he is close by and wants to drop in. I let him in. (mistake) He gets drunk and ends up passed out in my bed.

Contestant #3 – We talk on the phone and he seems nice enough, but he is 3 years younger than me and I do relate that I am a bit concerned about our age difference. He assures me that he is mature for his age and not to worry . We chatted on the phone about different restaurants in the city and he says pick any place in the city, he will take me. We agree on a tapas restaurant. I take the metro and meet him there. Conversation goes downhill pretty quickly when the topic turns to the fact that he is a pro at beer pong and flip cup. The check comes and I pull out my credit card. We split the check. I am not opposed to splitting a check at all, but the way he went on and on about “taking” me anywhere I wanted was laughable. He didn’t pick me or the check up. Where did he take me?

Contestant #4 – He was a very nice guy but he definitely lied about his height. I am a mere 5’3” and never even think twice about throwing on a pair of heels or tall boots when going out since most guys tower over me. I show up at the bar and I am seriously way taller than this guy. I have since learned that guys add at least two inches when stating height. Lying, even about height, will automatically excl ude you from date #2.

Friday, July 21, 2006

The First Three Words

This may be the shortest Bad Date Story we've ever published, but for a woman in her twenties, the first three words tell it all:
His mom drove. and paid.(Both in our twenties)
Pretty self explanatory. I wanted to die under a rock on mars.
-This is not my current boyfriend thank goodness-

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Return Of The Ex-man

I took a girl out to see Ray Charles in concert. She was a true hottie, and I was thrilled just to be with her. This was a first date for us and we were talking, getting to know each other better, and she mentioned she just got out of a relationship, where the guy dumped her for another girl, and she still had feelings for him. The concert began, and guess who walks up...the exboyfriend! There was one empty seat in the entire house as far as I could see, so he sits beside her, they start talking, and a couple of songs later his hand is on her knee, and a song after that their kissing, and after that song they leave together. Fortunately, this was Ray Charles in concert, and I sat there and watched the show. Hurt yes, but this was RAAAAYYYYY!! I ran into her a couple of weeks later and she didn't apoligize. A couple of years later I heard she was getting yet another guy.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Caught in The Headlights

Boy, oh, boy, I have so many! I guess I am quite an expert when it comes to dating horrible men. My absolute worst one was with this guy who let me wait for him in a restaurant for almost an hour. When he showed up, he told me that he was late because his ATM card broke in half when he tried to retrieve money. He asked me if I would mind if we postponed our date and when we walked out of the restaurant, said he wanted to talk to me for a bit. If I wanted to sit in his car with him for a while? So, there we were in his car. Then he told me that he had to take a pee and jumped out, walked right in front of the headlights, took out his you know what and took a long lavish leek. After jumping back in the car, he asked me if I would mind carrying his child, he would pay me for it. Do you think we hit rock bottom there? Naaah... I said: well, gee, you know what, I have to go and started to open the door and that was when he reached over and planted this disgusting, wet, garlic-reeking, prickly beard smackeroo right on my kisser. Needless to say, I didn't date anyone for about a year after that. Blech!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

The Nice Boy

I was set up on a blind date with this guy who a co-worker sweared was good looking. Yuh sure. To be nice, let's just say he wasnt my type, or anyone elses I know. Anyway, he picked me up in his mustang and kept staring at me from the corner of his eye. He shoulda been watching the road because he almost crashed like 3 times. I was nausous the whole time. All I kept thinking of was how to get outta this situation! OMG. His mom calls and we have to make a stop at his parents house before we actually go out. Its bad enough his parents crib?? Okay we get there and pretty much his whole family is there. Asking me questions like "So how long you been dating? Are you guys gonna be married? He's a nice boy you know..." LOL. I almost died in that living room. His older brother comes out of the bedroom to go to the bathroom and starts harassing me telling me to ditch his brother to spend one night with him!! What a sleaze. We finally leave and get to the movies. Of course on the way into the theater I see people that know me and I turn beet red trying to hide with the popcorn in front of my face. Oh, I pay for the date. It seems he's low on cash tonight. We get inside the theater and when the lights go out he leans in and touches my thigh....I throw up a little in my mouth. Then he makes a move. ALREADY?? Ugh...I dart away like frickin warp speed and tell him im gonna throw up. He asks if I would like him to console my pain?? I burst laughing and tell him I gotta go to the bathroom. What the hell do I do?!?! I walk out and he's outside the bathroom waiting for me! It seems he was sickly sweet. I tell him I puked and I need to go home. So we head out. The whole ride home was a talk about how his uncle and brother called to say that they would really like to see me pass by some time for family events. MHM...disgusting. Anyway, we pull up, I gag again as he leans forward to attempt to kiss me again. And step out walking very quickly as he stares at my ***....I watched him leave through my window, made sure the coast was clear called up my friends and headed out to for ten shots of vodka.'d think thats the end right?? Guess who walks through that bar door?
His uncle and brother...
What a night.
The next day I had call block service set up, and lots of tylenol

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Who Is That angry Woman? #1

My boyfriend and I went to the movies together. We started kissing, and this fat women and her husband, who were behind us, kept asking us to stop, because we were... Well... Anyway, I told the woman to (insertswearword)-off. When we left the theater the woman came up to us and shouted, "You're never to see this girl again!" It was my boyfriend's parents. They had been spying on us.

Who Is That Angry Woman ? #2

I have a bad date story. I had met this guy and we were talking off and on for about month but then we decided to go out to eat. We were sitting in a resturant and this huge woman came towards us screaming. I was so scared because she was so big and angry. After she calmed down I asked her what was wrong and she said that I was with her husband. I was so embarassed I quickly got up and ran out.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Rock Star

I met a guy on yahoo personals. (First mistake) We talked on the phone a few times and then met at a restaurant. He smiled (front tooth missing). It turns out he was at least 25 years older than I. Not wanting to be rude, I had dinner with him, where he proceeded to tell me that he was supposed to go on tour with AC/DC, but his truck broke down and they left without him, but not before stealing a song he had written. (No, he was not funning with me). He paid for dinner and then said let's go to a movie. Seeing no way out of it, I said OK. He said, I would have to drive since he didn't have a car. (Second mistake) We went to see Titanic. We get to the ticket counter and he said I would have to pay he was out of money. OK, I can live with that. But we get in the theatre and he starts quote Biblical scripture loud enough for the entire theatre to hear. I thought he was going to start a tent revival sermon when Kate Winslet's boob hit the screen. He then turns to me and says, "I feel like I've known you my entire life" At this point I excused myself to go to the ladies room and left his *** at the theatre.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

What's Your Story?

Do you have a true, bad date story? Can we have it please? Then your story can join the ranks of such literary pearls as:
"Thankyou For Coming", "The Stain in Spain" , "If the Spew Fits" , "The Speed Date" , or my choice for most embarrassing date, "Stuck On You" . and of course the "Worst Date Ever",! C'mon, you know you want to, so just do it! ( bet you've heard that on a date before) Just send it as an e-mail at or leave it in the comments section below.

Mr. Miami Vice

He was a fairly nice-looking guy, dark hair, 40-ish, except the top four buttons of his shirt were undone, exposing a decent amount of thick, curly chest hair, and he sported a fairly thick gold chain around his neck. I met him at a restaurant he chose. He said he knew the owner and that he got special meals prepared for him that weren't on the menu.
He ordered my meal for me without consulting me and was rude to the waitress.
Twice. His fancy, not-on-the-menu dinner arrived and looked just like steamed vegetables over rice. He said he just moved from Miami and started to brag about penthouse apartments, various boats, and trips around the world. He then mentioned how he was nervous because he was having his car shipped up here. He had never shipped a car before, but didn't
want to drive it and put all those miles on it. He's worried, what if something
should happen? My curiosity is now piqued after all his grand tales of wealth and success. What kind of car IS this? An antique? A Porsche? A Ferrari? Turns out his baby was a 1998
aqua-with-white-convertible-top Geo Tracker. The date was officially over when I said with a straight face, Huh. I always thought that to be a 16-year-old girls car.

Monday, July 03, 2006


Editors note: It took SIX dates to dump this guy?
My friend went out with this guy who told her some sob story about going through a divorce and that he was wealthy (he claimed to be some real estate big shot). Well, it turns out this guy said he had a car, but that it was in the shop (she never saw the mystery car). She had to drive him around on every date and he also wore the same outfit on every date (keep in mind that this was 6 dates over a 1 month period) . Then on one of the dates he asked her to stop at the ATM (it was one of the drive ups) and he couldn't take out any money because the account had less than $20 in it.
So one day he asked her out to the movies. She picked him up for the date (as always). When they were at the ticket window, he paid in QUARTERS for the tickets! He also paid in QUARTERS for the dinner, she offered to pay and he got angry with her. He was snappish with her the rest of the date. Then at the end of the date, asked her inside his house (he lived in a house with another guy and only had a TV and a mattress on the floor in his room). He actually wanted her to make out with him on the floor mattress after behaving like a jerk during the date. Thank God she declined and went home. She told me about the date the next day (she was so depressed). I made her see the humor in it (I told her that it was probably his laundry money - I mean the guy wore the SAME OUTFIT on every date) and it is now one of our favorite inside jokes (quarter man / rerun guy). LOL

Saturday, July 01, 2006


Got a Bad Date Story? GREAT! Can we have it? You can post it in the comments section below
or e-mail us at . Oh, and in case you missed it, check out "Stuck On You"
possibly one of the most embarrassing dates ever...but not the worst, you can find that one (if you're an's kinda rude) here :Worst Date Ever", Now c'mon, get writing, we need those stories!

Pukie's Tale

Ok, I was going out with this guy who was a supervisor at my work (not over me though) and he was SOOO hot, like my dream guy. he was buff and black and dressed so nice and was a couple years older than me and was totally hot. i was so excited when he asked me out. so we were going to go to a movie, but the earlier show was sold out so we went back to his appartment where all of his equally hot roomates were all hanging out. we were chillin around then his roomates decided to go get beer. (fyi i am a TOTAL lightweight and i only have to have like 4 beers before i am really really drunk) and when they got back i chugged a few beers and was gettin kinda buzzed and i chugged a couple more and before i could stop myself i turned around and threw up all over his model hot roomate. in front of my date, his hot friends, and everybody. the worst part was that i was too drunk to go home cause my family would freak out and i couldnt drive anyway so i had to stay there for like another 6 hours until my buzz wore off enough for me to drag myself into my room and go to sleep. the worst part was that he asked me out again and insisted that it wasnt that big of a deal and that it happened to everybody sometime. like an idiot i went out with him again and we stopped by his appartment and his roomates took one look at me and were like "hey its pukie!!! dude that was so gross! i hope your sober or i dont want you to come near me!" i was totally humiliated.