Wednesday, May 10, 2006

The PHD

I went on a blind date with a guy I met on the Internet. At dinner I mentioned I have a PhD. He said he had a PhD as well - pretty huge d1ck! That one didn't last beyond dinner.

Then there was a guy who asked me out to dinner. We went out to a nice place. He ordered up big and got a REALLY nice bottle of wine and even ordered dessert and coffee. When the check came he said "You look like you make more than me, you pay the check and I'll put out later!"

And being the magnet for losers that I am there is the guy who asked me out and then showed up with a pad of post-it notes. He proceeded to stick the notes everywhere. They all had his phone number on them because he said it was a "social experiment" to see if anyone would call him.

And lastly there was the guy who couldn't have sex without having The Simpsons playing on the TV! When he came he said "Oh God! Oh Marge!" Needless to say I didn't wait around to have little Bart, Lisa, and Maggie with him :-P