Saturday, January 07, 2006

The Speed Date

I'm a single guy and, due to my job don't get to meet alot of eligible women in my age range, so I decided to give one of those "speed dating events" a try. It was held in one of those large, multi-room, mega bars. Now I should mention that I suffer from just a touch of night blindness and the lights were very dim, so I was lurching up and down a bit (couldn't see the stairs on the multi-level floor) trying to find which room held the event.There I stood , squinting and scratching my head, when I spied two women holding the same speed dating brochure that I had in my hand. Problem solved! They got up from the bar, so I followed. Up some stairs, down a hall, through an open door and...the two women turned, wide eyed with anger and fright...I was in the womens bathroom!
I made my apologies, got some directions and finally found the correct location. The room had been separated into about twenty separate stations (tables) at each table sat a woman and the guys, at two minute intervals, would make their way from station to station until we had all had twenty two minute "speed dates". At table #1, the woman was nice, but no sparks, so I headed to table #2. Sat down and felt a cold ,wet puddle, spreading over my butt...the idiot guy in front of me had spilled a full glass of Jack Daniels on the seat, not cleaned it up and not told anybody! This meant that I spent the next 36 minutes, explaining to 18 women why I had:
a) been seen in the Womens Bathroom
b) was observed lurching around the main room.
c) smelled strongly like whiskey.
d) had a large wet stain on my butt...sigh
Strangely, quite a few women contacted me later...lucky for me I guess things really are desperate out there!

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