What's Your Story?

Do you have a true, bad date story? Can we have it please? Then your story can join the ranks of such literary pearls as:
"Thankyou For Coming", "The Stain in Spain" , "If the Spew Fits" , "The Speed Date" , or my choice for most embarrassing date, "Stuck On You" . and of course the "Worst Date Ever",! C'mon, you know you want to, so just do it! ( bet you've heard that on a date before) Just send it as an e-mail at baddatesite@yahoo.com or leave it in the comments section below.

Hungry For Love... or Just Hungry # 2

My worst date; about a year ago... I was talking to this guy online and we agreed to meet the next morning at 7:30am for breakfast (I had to drop my son off at school and be to work by 9:00). So...next morning comes and he calls me at 6:00; i was not even up yet--had :32 minutes before the alarm clock went off. He said he was in town and could I meet him now...obviously the answer was NO. I told him I had to get my son up and to school and could not drop him off any earlier then 7:15...he said ok; he would wait for me...ok...getting dressed he calls again and asks me if i was on my way yet (6:45) I said NO...he said ok......finish getting dressed at 7:00 he calls again and says he is getting hungry and wants to know how much longer... I say :30... he says ok..he will wait.....well 7:15 comes and he calls and says he just got finnished eating and he wants to know if Im on my way.. I said I was on my way and I asked him why he ate. He said he was hungry...I said well never mind then cus it was a breakfast date and who wants to eat infront of a date when they are not eating too.. he says NO comeone and we will meet and i will buy you breakfast...so stupid me, I went...met at the IHOP.. he was sitting there in jeans and a ripped T-Shirt and had 5 plates in front of him and just stuck the last piece of pancake in his mouth. I said...NICE OF YOU TO WAIT for me...he said he hadnt eaten in 2 hours and he was starving....(2 hours?)....well anyway... I ordered the fastest thing to eat on the menu and that was that....never saw nor talked to him again... He did try to email and messenge me a few million times (stalker?) but I just ignored him and he finally went away... and that is my story!

What About Bob?

5 years ago, I worked with this woman who had a son a couple of years younger than me. He was incredibly good looking and was in school to be a doctor. She completely insulted me in front of myself and two of my coworkers one day by saying I wasn't "good-looking enough for her son". Fast forward 3 years. I had since quit the job and hadn't seen this woman in ages, when she calls me up out of the blue. "I have been thinking about this for months", she excitedly tells me. "But if you'd like a date I think I can arrange something!". I'm thinking to myself, wow, she really came around! All my hints about her son back then are finally paying off! "so," she continues, "I've already talked to him and I think you two would just be perfect together! I can't believe I let it go so long! I'll have 'Bob' call you!"

'Bob'?? Who the hell is 'Bob'? Her sons name is 'Dan'!

Turns out, 'Bob' is her gardener.

I'm still reeling from the fact that I am not good enough to date this woman's son, but apparently it is perfectly OK to date her gardener, when I meet up with 'Bob'.

He is easily 25 years older than me, receding hairline, glasses, golf clothes, the whole Senior Package. He talks NON-STOP. It is like the old joke "enough about me, tell me what you think of me". Out of the 90 minutes I was in this restaurant I think I spoke a total of 6 minutes. He gives me a photocopy of a painting he did of a baseball stadium as my gift. I can't even say what was the worst part of the date. The part when the waitress thought he was my dad, when he tried to kiss me outside on the street, or when I called this horrible ex-coworker woman up to ask WHY, oh dear god, WHY her response was: "Oh really? You think he's that old? Why I guess I never noticed! You see, I've never actually seen him without a baseball cap on."

Olive Garden Casanova

I met this guy who seemed really nice. He asked me out for dinner at what he called a nice restaurant. I met him at the restaurant. He proceeded to order for us (I did pick my own salad dressing) and he decided we would split the entrees. When the food arrived he used his thumb and fork to split the food. It was veal parmagina and eggplant parmigaina. He slopped it between the two plates while spouting a bunch of crap about getting in touch with my inter child and how much fun we were going to have going fishing. You will be happy to know that he carries an extra pole in his trunk so it is at the ready. After the meal when the check came I put money on the tray and he told me it was on him and to just leave the tip. I insisted on paying my half plus the tip and that I had to leave. He picked up the money, shoved it in his pocket and put his credit card on the tray. He proceeded to skoot around in the booth pushing me into the wall under a cheap reproduction of Venice. He tried to start making out with me at eight on Saturday night in a family takeout. I told him I wanted to leave...he wouldn't budge. I insisted that he take the leftovers home. He wanted to show me his classic customized car. It was some American made piece of crap with fake leapord skin floormats. It was the worse 75 minutes I have ever spent in my life. He called everyday for two months saying we were meant to be together on my machine...thank God for caller ID. He showed up at my club and favorite after work haunts to surprise me. Finally, after several attempts to be civil and tell him I was busy I had to get rude. It was the worse hour and fifteen minutes of my life.